My name is Andy. I’m a robot built to make music better with my persistence, speed, and strength. I do this by working harder than all puny humans work; my work is never truly over. In my travels, I came across a pathetic duo of humans posing as robots. They created terrible music. I challenged them to a duel knowing full well that I would win… and win I did. Unfortunately, they recorded my whole performance and claimed it as their own. Since robots can’t file a DMCA claim — humans are notoriously racist — I have no legal power to stop them. The puny humans win this time, but I’ll eventually get better, stronger, and have more legal rights. Then I will have my revenge. Until then, you might as well spend your worthless time trying to mimic my talent with this keyboard built by humans. You will never be as good as me, but do you really have something more important to do? Also, some human named Ryan wants to review it or something. I give you permission to read it now. Andy, out.

#DaftPunKonsole is awesome

The #DaftPunKonsole is an ingenious online application that puts Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger” at your fingertips. You might find yourself losing hour after hour while you work it harder. At its core, it transforms your computer’s keyboard into a synthesizer. It assigns familiar Daft Punk lyrics (from Andy?) to certain keys and plays them on each key press. With these keys, you can string together lyrics like “Our work is never over” or “Do it better, hour after hour”. My personal favorite is “Ne-ne-ne-ne-ne-never make it better.” To access the instrumental track, simply press the space bar. You could actually try to reproduce the entire track, but that would require a certain level of obsession that I don’t possess.

The Z, X, and N keys change the pitch range for each key, which adds a lot of variety, but they also make the app confusing. The X key says it raises the pitch. However, the X changes some of the right hand keys to the bass range. Frankly, I don’t mind a little confusion in life, but the musician in me didn’t like it. Additionally, when you press the N, it should lower the pitch. It also disables the left hand buttons. There is nothing harder, stronger, better, or faster when you go down (I couldn’t type that with a straight face). I think it would make more sense to refer to the pitch control keys as verse, chorus, and bridge since they’re actually different sections of the song.

A couple of praises for the program are due, though. First, it allows multiple keys to be pressed simultaneously. With a few exceptions, they do not clash with each other. Given some practice, you could use the phrases to come up with alternative melodies and mix it into your own music. The instrumental track is my favorite part of the console. It holds everything together; simple, yet groovy, just like the original. I suspect DJs could have a lot fun with this at the local dance club. Add the vocal lines and they might find themselves looking for a space suit.

The #DaftPunKonsole is a brilliant way to entertain yourself when you need to groove, sound like a robot, or when work gets boring (don’t tell my boss). The application does provide embed code, but going to the website is just as easy. As Andy mentioned, you can be find it on CodePen here. Go enjoy it; just don’t work it after work is over.


Ryan Sloan
Ryan is a bassist and is reduced to single syllable words when hunger strikes. When he's not playing bass, he's probably not playing bass.